By: Melissa Johnston
I have three children. When I was pregnant with my middle child I told people that I was praying hard for a child who was “normal-smart.” Most people would look at me funny, but every once in a while, someone would nod and say “I understand.” These were the fellow parents of gifted children.
My husband and I were both in gifted programs while growing up. I knew that it was a strong possibility that at least one of my children would also be gifted. I knew what to look for early on and how to identify signs of giftedness. What I did not know was what a challenge raising a gifted child would be.
It was apparent very early on that Arthur was gifted. I would get those “Your Baby This Week” emails from a popular website and every single bullet point would cover something that Arthur had mastered months before. His vocabulary was ridiculously advanced and he could speak in complete sentences before he was out of diapers. He was curious about how things worked and he was bored with the watered down version of science offered by Bill Nye by the time he was four. I’m sure all of this sounds very familiar to many of you.
It was also apparent, at least to us, Arthur was also twice exceptional (see the P.A.G.E. article Gifted Children Who are Twice Exceptional). In addition to being gifted, Arthur has attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder. This was easy enough for me to understand, because I was identified as being gifted while being evaluated for ADD during my early elementary years.
While his father and I could clearly see both of these aspects of Arthur’s life, we felt as though no one else could. People would only see one or the other. Those who knew him outside of an academic setting would comment on how bright he was, how engaging, how smart, how precocious. Teachers at his preschool or daycare would talk about how they couldn’t get him to listen, how he wouldn’t nap, how he played too rough. Shortly before he started 1st grade, I had him evaluated for WINGS (the local gifted pullout program) and he didn’t quite qualify. When I asked him about the test, he said that he couldn’t remember the questions and that it was hard to focus on what he was being asked to do.
Our family was at our wit’s end. By this time we had a toddler (who, despite my prayers, is proving not to be “normal-smart” after all) and I was expecting our third (the jury is still out on him). While his father and I are both gifted, Arthur’s intellect can still be overwhelming. It feels as though his brain is always on, and our brains never get a break. Not being challenged in school meant constantly increasing the challenge at home, which isn’t always an easy task.
Enter the very best school counselor. She provided me with letters to Arthur’s pediatrician and armed me with the right language to get the help he needed. She insisted he get tested for WINGS again. She believed me and provided me with the resources our family was so desperate for. Being listened to made a huge difference.
I’m so grateful for the WINGS program – for Sara Lampe’s leadership 40 years ago in it’s creation and for Springfield Public Schools continued recognition of the importance of Gifted Education. I am looking forward to advocating for support for Phelps, to supporting the student body and fellow parents, and watching my child grow into his potential.
Melisabeth Johnston is the resource development manager for community partnerships for the Girl Scouts of the Missouri Heartland. She is a Minnesota native who enjoys baking, reading, the theatre, and the outdoors. She and her husband have three children: Arthur (7), Maggie (2), and Harry (3 months).